The idea of an open marriage may be new to many, but there have been people practicing some form of open marriage, or marriage with multiple partners, for decades. And in fact, many people are in marriages with multiple partners, they just don’t know about it.
We call this cheating in our culture.
Open Marriage is More Honest
The recent New York Times Magazine article, titled “Is an Open Marriage a Happier Marriage,” reveals that increasing numbers of people are practicing a more honest and open approach to long term commitment. The idea of an open marriage making both partners happy is a radical idea, since it involves some radical discussions with high levels of honesty.
Most couples would rather avoid the conflict.
Another term for “open marriage” is consensual non-monogamy, and this includes all the different forms of relationships that can be part of an inclusive, sustainable marriage. The common element is that all decisions around additional partners are the result of a consensual agreement – the people involved have agreed to a type of non-monogamy that works for both of them.
The New Monogamy Can Include Open Marriage
In my book, The New Monogamy, I explore one form of non-monogamy practiced by married couples who want to stay married and keep their marriage the focal point.
This relationship style allows for more fluidity in the relationship and encourages different types of openness, such as a willingness to experiment sexually.
There are many benefits to this kind of a relationship, but it can be tricky to manage. If you and/or your partner are interested in discussing the possibility of opening your relationship and creating your new monogamy agreement, my book is a great place to start.
Ways to Explore Your New Monogamy
In my book, I walk you through the ways you and your partner can begin a conversation that will allow you to explore new ideas and the challenges of expanding your monogamy agreement. In this type of conversation, everyone’s voice matters.
I can also facilitate these discussion in person. If you are interested in a session, a workshop, or a couples intensive, please contact me for more information. I have one spot open this month for an Intensive, but contact me soon, before it goes.
Good luck with your new monogamy agreements!