Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith are transparent about their open monogamy. Over the years they have hinted at their open relationship and recently confirmed consensual nonmonogamy to be their choice of relationship commitment. Watching celebrities come out about their personal lives normally means stories about conflict and divorce. Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith stand out as celebrities who live up to their commitments to staying together and share their true north – the values of honesty, transparency, and openness.
While they have not been without turmoil over the years, Will Smith shared about his love for Jada and how that love shows up in a relationship structure that demonstrates a non-conventional relationship that works for the both of them.
The relationship they share is an example of what I call Open Monogamy. Open Monogamy means you are married or committed to a primary or central partner but have a flexible or fluid monogamy agreement. It takes understanding, communication, and a strong foundation to make this kind of open monogamy work.
Understanding We Are Individuals
“Jada had family members that had an unconventional relationship. So, she grew up in a way that was very different than how I grew up.” – People Magazine quoting Will Smith’s interview with GQ.
From the outside, Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith represent a traditional family with a 24-year marriage and children. They are committed to one another and clearly offer support to each other. Yet Will and Jada are also respectful of the fact that each person is an individual who might look for different experiences. They own their unique desires and sexuality.
What could this look like in your relationship?
Creating a connected relationship with freedom to pursue romantic or erotic partnerships outside of your monogamy agreement is not easy. It’s important to know yourself and your own limits and be able to explore and express your feelings.
It can be a difficult conversation in the beginning. If you want to talk to your partner about the potential of opening up your monogamy, it’s important that you don’t assume what your partner may feel. There are some things that may sound exciting about opening a traditional monogamous relationship, but it can also feel threatening to take these kinds of chances.
The early talks between you and your partner can be challenging but talking about your concerns and your fantasies is an important first step to communicating with your partner.
Before you approach a conversation about open monogamy, remember that each of you is an individual with unique needs and feelings. Building trust starts with honesty and willingness to wait before acting on anything separately until you agree on a new monogamy agreement that works for you both.
To check out my new book “Open Monogamy-Co-Creating Your Ideal Relationship Agreement” go to Sounds True Publishing, Amazon, Barnes and Noble or anywhere books are sold.
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