Why is marriage harder now than ever before?

Marriage today faces some incredible challenges, possibly more than ever before in history. Modern couples don’t just struggle with basic communication, sex and parenting issues. Now couples face the everyday roommate problems of living together PLUS the difficulties of the technological modern world. Recently I asked a panel of YourTango Relationship Experts, “What’s going to happen to marriage and couples in the future?”

When an already stressed out couple hits a rough patch, it can be dooms-day-city. In fact, with the divorce rate returning to its rate of 50% in some cities, it’s a concern for anyone going into marriage these days to think about WHY so many of us are calling it quits.

Is it true that the odds of staying married are worse than they were in the past?

The truth may not be that black and white. Fewer people are getting married now than ever before. In 2010 less than 24% of people in the US were married, according to PEW social graphics. That’s the lowest rate of marriage since 1895. And half of those marriages are not working. In fact, the divorce rate was doing better during the recession and has fallen back to the 50% average since the housing market has improved and couples can afford to sell their homes once again. The couples that put off divorce during the difficult financial years rushed to divorce court and now divorce is back.

But not all couples get divorced. For those who stay, how do they survive the many predictable snags in their relationship, when it can be hard to stay the course?

What gets in the way of a successful relationship?

All too often, instead of taking the time to figure out what’s really going on, a couple may ignore the problem in the hopes that it’ll either solve itself or just go away.

And that right there is the biggest problem!

On the panel that I moderated for YourTango, Imago Institute’s Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt, Psychotherapist Dr. Jamie Turndorf, Spiritual Psychotherapist Tracy B. Richards and Psychotherapist Ross Rosenberg stress that even though the expectations that come with being married in today’s age can end up stressing out a relationship, there are ways that couples can fight through them and manage to stay together, in a happy and connected partnership.

Watch the video on YourTango to find out how you can be sure your marriage is happy, healthy, and successful.

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